Hello everybody, Thanks a lot for appreciating the First Part of Basics of 143. I wasn’t expecting such a warm and delightful response on a topic like Teenage love, but am glad seeing the people praise. Praise be to the Lord who has shown me such things on which I can write over. Anyways its time I present before you the second part titled- Basics of 143 !!!- The Pillars of Relationship.
I am not a veteran who can preach the world about love, but I am just a teenager who knows something about it from his memoirs and would like to share the same with his blog readers. Let me start with factors that I reckon, a couple needs to incorporate within them to make the relation reach from courtship to marriage. Here I go:
Trust: Well understood for anybody, a relationship survives long only if you trust your partner blindly (YES, Blindly). Most of the relationships break because of distrust and thoughtless suspicion. Guys please, if you really love someone, trust that someone enough. Nothing is a barrier for trust. Be it distance, be it time or be it communication. Especially the people in Long Distance relationship lack the trust factor. Guys, distance is no barrier in love. Distance doesn’t decrease the love between you and yours, nor does it decrease the longing or the crave in each other’s heart to be ONE. It’s just that you need to trust your love enough.
Accepting and Submitting: Again the most important factor of relationship is accepting the other person as he/she is. Every person has his/her positives and negatives. Each has individual has his/her strength/weakness. Each one of us is a unique creation of God. Therefore, don’t try to modify your partner’s thinking or approach. Accept him/her as he/she is. Since you’ve fallen in love with the person, I believe, it becomes your moral responsibility to accept him/her the way he/she is. Submitting. Now what does this mean? When in love, submit yourself to your better-half. Agar aap pyaar karo to sab kuch luta ke karo. Love knows no bounds. Do the maximum you can do for your better-half so much that even nature bows down against your seamless love for your better-half. Submitting means being hers/his in entirety. There is a saying in Gujarati which well describes the act of submitting-“HU TAARO NE TU MAARI, TEL LEVA JAAY AA DUNIYA SAARI”(Meaning: I am Yours , You are Mine, Hell with the World.). Damn with the world. If the world says “Yeh to Joru ka Gulaam ban gaya hai”, let them who cares. If the world says “Yeh ladki to Uske Piche Diwaani Ho Gayi Hai”, let them, who cares. Remember, at the end of the day, it’s the word of your close ones which matters; word of the outer word holds no importance for anybody. World is speaking let it speak, to hell with it.
Love V/S Career: In this life full of challenges, life and the world poses against us, innumerable hurdles to be hopped over on the way to love and success. As far as Teenage love is concerned, the biggest hurdle that comes in the way of love is CAREER. People are too much career oriented these days. At times, people go so gaga over their career and future that, they end up ending up their relationship. Guys, if you take me, there is something called destiny. If you’re to become something, if you’re to achieve something in life, you will achieve it anyhow. Don’t get conscious over something thoughtlessly. For the sake of your career why sidetrack your better half? If you ask me, your family and your better half deserve the first priority in your life. Career can be regained and remade, Love cannot. Love is not at all a hindrance to your academic/professional success. Rather it’s a catalyst, which boosts you up to achieve your goal. But in the endeavor to achieve your academic/professional goals make sure you don’t give away with your relationship. This is the common mistake to which everybody fall a prey easily. But make sure you don’t.
Flawless Understanding: Understanding between the two of you is a vital necessity if you need to reach from courtship period to the marriage day and from marriage promises to the death bed together. “He didn’t call up today, then why should I? He has no time for me, then why should I have some for him? It’s her mistake, she shall apologize and approach me first, I won’t talk to her until she does. She talks to her male friend more than she does to me. Why? I have been SMSing her all day long, she doesn’t care to reply me once. What the hell.” All these statements are conceived of Lack of Understanding between the two. I can’t explain much to make the blogpost mundane, but please note this sentence of mine-“When you’re in a relationship don’t think as you yourself, instead put yourself in the place of your partner and think from his/her perspective.” You will find answers to your all WHYs. Don’t be stubborn; comply with the need of the hour to sustain your relationship.
Except Expectations: The last thing to be kept in mind in a relationship. Remember true love is GIVING, just GIVING. Give your better half all you can in terms of love and materialism (if required, most of the times its not) without expecting anything in return. I know its tough, because all humans are subject to expectations in return of their giving. But the philosophy of giving deals with expectations miraculously. At the end of the day, when you’re about to fall asleep, you sleep contented, that yes I have done all I can for him/her. More importantly, the Art of Giving, shows its prudence if the relationship doesn’t work out. God forbid, if in case a relationship doesn’t work out, you won’t regret, you won’t rankle that “It was I who couldn’t give sufficient inputs to the relation”. The breakup won’t let you down in remorse, but the Art of Giving will let you move ahead in life with content.
Here I conclude my blogpost Basics of 143, I hope you all have liked reading it. I agree it was heavy and philosophical, but this is how Anish is from the core. I believe a lot in having a concrete philosophy of life, love being an integral part of it, I have one pertaining to it too.. I wanted to share a part of my philosophy pertaining to love and that’s what I just did. So like, this was all from my end. Do comment over it and let me know if I was right in jotting down the above factors.
P.S. If you have a question in your mind that how did I come to know all this, was I with somebody, please try and curb it then at there, I won’t be able to answer that.
dil se yaar…its the best till date, after your article on “You in yourself”
sach me each and every word of it is so true… just every damn relationship on this earth needs to have all these…trust, understanding, submission,…etc..
life is just so beautiful…and its worth living just b’coz we share such relationships with our loved ones…its lyk “HEAVEN ON EARTH”…
Hehehe… got carried away again… “but this is how I am” 😉
simply loved it…
its been lyk years we’ve knwn each other…tlkd to u loads of times…but each time u simply amaze me…achcha…u r actually 18 toh??? 😛
jst kidding…
waiting for more… 🙂
(now my comment became very long as well…kya karoon… )
Very true….again you described it so beautifully…and I have no words….just simply superb…..
You know what when i start reading it and when i read ur first factor, my mind said at that very moment…. Thats TRUE!!
Evn i always had a believe that a relation needs these factors, Just these few factors and nothing else. U got to do this much for ur love…
coz falling in love is very easy but maintaining it for long tym isnt an easy job.
I totally agree with u dear, blind trust is sumthing wich is indeed very imp for a relation. On the other side mutual understanding also. Usually we mis-understands things in our frustration and ends up our relation.
Gosh! how can u do this ….just for one silly mis-understanding how can u end it up.
Coming next to accepting, so it always reminds me of the dailogue of mohabbatein film… “agar koi apse pyaar kare toh apse karein, koi apko badal ke pyaar karein toh woh pyaar nahi sauda hota hai aur jaani pyaar mein kabhi sauda nahi hota”
two ppl cant be totally same, not even twins, so how can u expect ur partner to be the same kind of u are or the kind u want him/her to be. Love as he or she is.
Dear, u said what even the buks dun or any article. Its nyc to knw that even todays generation the youngsters have forgotten totally. They follow a short term relation… make a gf, be together for few days and end it up to move to next.
Thats totally crap. Are u being in a relation or job. One person is more stable to his or her jobs than the love type relation ppl follow nowdays.
I appraise u for this. U knw what i m surely gonna share this blog with my frnds who actually dunno the real meaning of love.
Well, love is to sacrifice urself not expecting and plzz nver let it go coz of ur goals. Sacha pyaar badi mushkilo se milta hai use aise mat jaane dena.
Hatsoff to u dear, though no thanx in frndship but yet i would like to as u literally cheered me up by ur this blog.
God bless you! Be like you are never change coz u are just the best.
I believe that is all about what you said. I told in my first blogpost itself, along with me, the readers too at the end will say “YES I TOO BELIEVE THAT”
very true!!
Hey I must say it’s a good one..
The trust part is really true..When u’re in a long distance relationship,all u need is trust and who says they don’t work,they do if u trust ur partner..That gujrati saying was awesome, I mean its translation.. ” Im urs,u’re mine, Hell with the world” Ahh i loved it..Can i use it as a status lol 😀
Yeah people do leave their partners for their career..
That “flawless understanding” is awesome,mindblowing. I myself believe that no reason can be that big to fight with ur partner in a relationship. Such things like lack of time,doubts,ego – they are nuthin and worthless if u love someone and who knows where love takes u, just be with them and cherish every moment 🙂
I wanna read the first part too 🙂
Yes you can use it as your Fb status…
I connect this article with the other one ” The fall”. You have answerd it all. I just reproduce some of the comments:
” Each one of us is unique creation of God” Let us respect his wish gracefully.
” At the end of the day, it is the words of your closed ones which matters. Words of outside world holds no imporatnce”
I agree to each and every word of this article, so very true…Love is about giving, without expectations, trusting blindly and taking care of others feelings.