I’ve always been a Straight-A Grade student, and I had never questioned that before. Now that I am finally into a well reputed Engineering University though, I’m starting to wonder why did grades matter so much, why getting into a “good” college was so important. I’m questioning the importance of material success for the first time, and realizing that the only reason I continue to complete pointless assignments and study for tests whose only purpose is to prepare me for another test is because I’m expected to? Or that will lend me a few more bucks in the Placement Interview?
My father yelled at me for an hour when my report card in 11th Standard for a weekly test in Physics had come. I’d got 6 on 40 in Rotational Motion, the chapter which I used to hate the most. “How will you get into a reputed Engineering College which such horrible marks?”, slamming my room door he said furiously. “Note my words, you’re just going to do a simple B.Sc and nothing else. Engineering is something you won’t be able to persue with such marks”, he added in angst. I asked why I would want to good marks in such small and big exams. To get a high paying job, he said. And I said, I don’t need a high-paying job to be happy, I want to be an entrepreneur. Why would I want a stressful job, why would I want to get into a highly selective college? His answer: Because you can make it. I thought who am I to disappoint my family? Though it was just the onset of winter, emotional storms seemed to have gobbled my room and my heart.
It’s like that joke- the one where a mother is taking a walk with her two toddlers and a stranger comes up to her and starts fussing over the children, saying how adorable they are, asking how old they are. The mother replies: the lawyer is five, and the doctor is three. Are we, as children, teenagers, students, even professionals, defined by others’ expectations? Parents are the real ones who care about us but who the hell is the outer world to put pressure of their expectations on us?
To put it in simple words you don’t know where you want to go with your life, and others(everybody your neighbours, accquaitances) know where they want you to go with it, so you might as well follow their wishes since you need to prove yourself to their word that you can match up to anyone’s expection, but at the end of the day you end up forgetting your personal wishes and your personal aims. I am sure you just wonder if you would find out someday that what they want isn’t at all what you want, and that it’s too late to go back and start over.
I would conclude saying that, YES do respect your parents’ dreams and expectation. But at the same time don’t get pressurized hearing people’s statments like “You’re capable of an IIT or an IIM.” OR “You must definitely try for a CA or CS. You’ve brilliant mind”. These are cliche statements that every neighbour/acquaintance would tell you after your 10th Standard. But as my article’s titlte says- Dont worry, just except the expectations. Work hard, your Aim is waiting for you to reach to it.
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Love & Regards,